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Thursday, October 14, 2010

Mind the Gap

If you live where I live and you use public transportation you will surely know this phrase 'Mind the Gap'. A reminder to stay away from danger. As I get older, Marriage and what not become more real to me and I would be lying if I said thoughts on it don't cross my mind every other day.

Just today a friend of mine told me he was extremely scared over marriage. And I told him it really wasn't a do or die affair. If you can't make the commitment forget about it (Mind the gap). Marriage causes divorce, especially when people don't even know what they are doing (they think they do ofcourse). The general belief of marriage is the commitment of both parties to each other. But it is one thing to believe and another to believe trust or rely on that commitment, and do all that should be done to keep the promise. He believes his parents made a mistake and surely doesn't want to get caught up in the same.

Marriage for any other reason catapults the union into a myriad of problems as life has shown us and we decide to stay blind. It's funny that the bible doesn't say much (if any) about kids when it comes to marriage perhaps cause marriage is the cleaving of two souls alone. But my friend says he wants to get married because of kids. Selfishness, I immediately think because a broken home is not just where parents are separated or divorced. A broken home is where there is no commitment or love between parents and when kids sense that, it's hardly a good outcome. I told my friend to stop complaining and to get ready for wahala if that is his purpose. He is setting the kids up already for future 'brokenness'
For any relationship to function at its best there must be commitment, love,  kindness. . . .no gaps.


jemimahnaa said...

marriage!!highly overrated issue..its not a do or die affair but it seems it is in most parts of the world.with the pressure to go into marriage and the realisation that there's more to it than meets the wonder divorce is on the rise..

GamineGirlie said...

No wonder..people need to leave it alone! lol